I'm sorry, spiders, that I today
Reeked havoc on your homes,
Forced you to your catacombs,
And crushed your dreams (and exoskeletons) in every possible way.
Perhaps you should consider building future subdivisions
In areas not used for airsoft,
Or maybe set them more aloft—
Just be more careful with your zoning decisions.
You see, my friends, when being shot
With stinging plastic pellets,
And accumulating a collection of welts,
Its easy not to see your webs and in them to be caught.
So take my advice and make everyone glad
By sticking to insects as your source of food.
I'm sorry I don't mean to be rude,
But a web in my face sure makes me mad.
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